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如何教育孩子他才会感谢你
10 Things Your Teens Will Thank You For Eventually做10件事情你的孩子最终会感激你
The teenage years can be a test of wills. Here are 10 things that your teen will eventually thank you for.青少年时期是一个意志考验的阶段。做10件事情你的孩子最终会感激你
1. Being a good parent, not a good friend.1. 做个好父母,而不是好朋友
Parents are teachers, role models, protectors. Parents enforce bedtimes, impose curfews, and don’t buy their kids every new tech gadget or let them use them unmonitored. Good parents certainly don’t share their own problems and burdens with their kids. Or at least they shouldn’t.父母是老师,榜样,保护者。父母强制就寝时间,实施宵禁,不给孩子们买新科技玩具或让他们在没有被监督的情况下玩这些玩具。好父母不会与孩子分享自己的问题和负担,当然也不应该。
2. Saying “no” once in awhile.2. 偶尔说“不”
As parents, it is our nature to try to say “yes” as much as we can. We want our kids to be happy and we say things like “They are only kids once, so it’s OK to spoil them.” That’d be wrong.Sometimes, you need to say “no” to them too. It’s an early lesson on how to cope with disappointment and gives them the ability to not be crippled by it.作为父母,我们的本性趋势我们尽可能的说是。我们想让我们的孩子幸福并且会说“他们只能当一次小孩子,所以可以宠着他们“。这是错误的。有的时候你也需要对他们说不。怎么应对困难和不被困难禁锢是(孩子们)早期需要学习的。
3. Not handing out trophies for showing up.3. 不为了炫耀而给予奖励
In the quest to instill high self-esteem in our kids, some of us deluded them into thinking they were the best, the greatest, the fastest, the smartest — even when they weren’t. While having high self-esteem is great, so is the ability to know that most rewards in real life tend to go to those who actually work the hardest.为了给孩子灌输强大的自尊心,有些人会引导孩子思考他们是最好的,最棒的,最快的和最聪明的-甚至事实上并不是。即使拥有强大的自尊心是好事,能够懂得真正生活的奖赏是给那些最努力的人也是好事。
4. Not bringing your baggage to the table.4. 不要把烦恼摊开来说
Sure the divorce was ugly and the dating scene is brutal. Don’t make your problems your kids’ problems.离婚诚然不是一件光鲜的事情,约会的场面也显得很残酷。但是不要让你的问题成为你孩子的问题。
5. Not judging their friends.5. 不对他们的朋友品头论足。
The girl your son brings home may be sporting a skirt so short that there’s nothing left to the imagination. Your daughter’s new best friend is failing classes and wants your A-student to be her new homework partner. Your kids bring home new friends who you don’t like for myriad reasons. Just keep your mouth shut. 你儿子带回家的女孩可能穿了一件很短的裙子,以至于都没有余地去幻想。你女儿的好朋友考试总不及格,想要你得A的孩子成为他做作业的新同伴。你的孩子们带回家一些你各种都看不上眼的新朋友。闭上你的嘴巴吧。
6. Giving them a“no questions asked” $20 bill for a ride home.6. 当他们要求20美金乘车回家的时候,二话不说
It shows you trust them (to not get in the car with an intoxicated driver) and that you remember what it was like being their age. Be glad they are safe.这表明你信任他们(不搭乘一个醉醺醺的司机的车),而且你仍然记得这是他们这个年纪可以做的事情。你要为他们的安然无恙而感到高兴。
7. Supporting them when they feel ready to leave the nest.7. 当他们准备好要离开家的时候支持他们
Not all baby birds learn to fly at the same time.But the only way to know they are ready is to let them try.并不是所有的幼鸟都能在同一时间学会飞翔。但是唯一知道他们准备好飞翔的方法就是让他们飞。
8. Lettingthem make their own mistakes.8. 让他们自己犯自己的错误
While your mistakes were traumatic and life-altering, they wereyourmistakes. Nobody but you can really learn from them. Let your kids figure it out.纵使你犯的错误是让人伤心且改变人生方向的,但那也是你的错误。除了你没人能够汲取教训。让你的孩子们自己解决。
9. Teaching them about manners.9. 教他们一些关于礼仪的东西
Manners are based on consideration of others. Teach them to say “please” and “thank you.” Teach them to hold doors for strangers, to not cut off other drivers, to offer to help when they see someone who needs it. Teach them kindness.礼仪是给予对别人的尊重。教他们去说“谢谢”和“对不起”。教他们去为陌生人挡门,不要打断其他的司机,当别人需要帮助的时候去伸出援手。教他们要亲和。
10. Teaching them how to disagree while still loving someone.10. 教会他们即使对于所爱的人也要持有不同的意见
Not every quarrel is the final quarrel. Not every disagreement means the end of a relationship. Teach them how to fight clean.并不是每一个争吵都是最后的争吵。不是每个分歧都意味着一段感情的结束。教他们如何纯粹的对事不对人。
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