- 相关推荐
克服职场社交中的羞涩
害羞和社交焦虑症通常都是杏仁核过度兴奋造成的现象，而杏仁核则是一种根据环境接收刺激的大脑组织。害羞或有社交焦虑症的人，杏仁核一般都非常敏感——这一方面跟基因有关，另一方面则归因于他们的成长经历。在害羞或社交焦虑的人看来，未知环境都是非常危险的。所以，我们来看看下面这12个克服害羞和社交焦虑症的方法吧。
6 Steps to Overcoming Shyness and Social Anxiety
6步克服羞涩和社交焦虑症：
1. Reality Check
认清事实
Step number one is to recognize what is taking place chemically in your brain when you’re feeling anxious or shy.
第一步就是要弄清楚当你感到紧张或害羞时，大脑会发生怎样的化学变化。
You are not abnormal; your brain is just "unusually" sensitive to new stimuli, causing you to proceed with extreme caution – usually "unnecessary caution". Just knowing this will help you rationalize what’s going on and will help relax you in future situations.
你没有“不正常”：只不过你的大脑对新刺激“格外”敏感罢了，以至于你表现得特别谨慎——一般都是些“不必要的谨慎”。认识到这一点有助于你理性面对正在发生的事情，进而在以后环境中做到自如放松。
No need to become shy or anxious, just tell yourself that it’s just some chemicals and cells reacting based on a perceived threat that’s not really there – no need to panic (ignore the racing heart and sweaty palms) – just calm down and proceed intelligently.
没必要害羞或焦虑，你只要告诉自己：这些不过是假想危险引发的化学与细胞反应罢了。也没必要惊慌，别去管那加速的心跳和冒汗的手心，尝试镇静下来并机智应对。
2. Don’t Ponder on Negative Thoughts
不要陷入消极思维
When you give a presentation – there’s always three presentations involved: There’s the presentation you planned on giving, there’s the presentation you actually gave, and then there’s the presentation you wish you gave.
如果你要作报告，那么报告无非就三种形式：你正在发布的报告、你已经发布的报告，以及你打算发布的报告。
When you focus on what you could have done better, when you focus on the negative, you create a cycle of negativity. After you leave a meeting, or a dinner party, or a social gathering, don’t ponder on how you could have been "better". Don’t think, "Why did I say that?"
当你一味想着本可以做得更好时，当你只看到消极方面时，你就会形成消极循环模式。所以，会议、派对或集会结束后，请不要纠结自己本可以表现得“更出色”，也不要懊恼“刚才我干嘛要那样说?”。
Everyone says something foolish from time-to-time, however, focusing on negativity will lead you to believe that you are a person who says the wrong things at social gatherings; that belief will manifest itself every time. Recognize that everyone says something foolish from time-to-time; don’t ponder, move on.
每个人难免都会说些蠢话，如果你只看到消极面，渐渐就会真的以为自己在社交时只会说错话;而且，这种想法每次都会应验。请记住：每个人偶尔都会说些蠢话。所以，不要纠结，该干啥就干啥去吧。
3. No Pressure
不要有压力
Don’t feel pressure to be interesting, entertaining, or talkative. Just be your normal-natural self. It’s the pressure to be like someone else that enhances social anxiety and shyness.
不要为了表现得风趣、讨人喜欢或健谈而感到紧张不安。做回你平常的样子就行。模仿别人的压力会加剧社交焦虑感和羞涩。
You have survived participating in conversations your entire life. Your next conversation in a group is just one more conversation – you are not required to be the life of the party. Just be yourself and speak your mind when you have something to say – and if you don’t have anything to say – no pressure; "chill out" and have fun.
你这辈子一直就是在与人谈话中成长过来的。接下来在小组中的发言实质上也是谈话而已——你又不一定非得成为派对的活跃分子啊。你只要做好自己，有话就说、无话则沉默;不要紧张，放松点吧。
克服开学焦虑
离开学还有一周左右，暑假里许多同学每天看电视、上网打游戏、吃喝玩乐到晚上12点多才睡觉，第二天早上10点多才起床。甚至有的同学对即将上学产生了厌恶、烦燥心理。诸多家长很着急，打来热线电话咨询，孩子们如何应对开学焦虑症?昨日，记者采访了国家二级心理咨询师、大竹中学的心理老师赖长林，赖老师建议家长们要利用好剩下的假期，调整好孩子的身心状态，积极迎接新学期。
督促孩子完成作业，复习功课
很多中小学生常常到开学最后一两天才想起要做作业，不仅身心疲惫，也使假期作业的质量不高。因此，家长要敦促孩子在最后一周每天合理安排时间，完成作业，复习功课。尽量避免参加旅游和参与刺激的活动，严加控制玩游戏机、上网的时间，让心情慢慢平静下来。
按学校的作息时间调整好生物钟
在临近开学的一周，家长要引导孩子开始适应上学的生物钟，尽可能地按时起床、睡觉和用餐，并配合一定的户外活动。学生应当明确假期过后的主要任务还是学习。家长也应帮助、督促孩子按上学的作息时间来安排最后一周的生活。对学生在假期未能达成的愿望，只要是合理的、可能的，就跟孩子订好计划，尽量在下一个假期里实现，作为激励孩子在新学期学业进步的一种手段和方法。
和孩子一起制订新学期学习计划
进入新学期，家长和孩子都该有新的计划和打算，可以在开学前好好计划一下。计划的内容应让孩子经过努力可以达到的，期望值不宜太高，让孩子还没执行就自动放弃。另一方面要预习新学期的功课，有的放矢地为新学期做好准备。制订学习计划、树立目标可以帮助孩子树立自信心，消除假期后的失落感。
创造乐于学习的家庭氛围
身教重于言教，家长本身的言行对孩子的影响巨大，例如：要孩子按时睡觉休息，但家长却约上几个好友，在家里通宵打麻将。那孩子能休息得好吗?家长应该在这段时间内，和孩子一起把生活作息恢复到平时的状态，并尽量创造乐于学习的家庭氛围。
补充学习用品调动上学积极性
家长要以积极、乐观的态度，激励、引导、暗示孩子，家长可以与孩子一起聊聊学校里面的同学、老师，帮助孩子放松紧张心情，说一些欣赏和鼓励的话语，从正面的角度给孩子以信心。同时给孩子补充一些必要的学习用品，让孩子感到上学的幸福感，期待着开学。
另外，家长和孩子们可以通过运动放松心理，迎接新学年的生活。要开学了，孩子和家人一起做做家务，散散步，在这过程中聊天，彼此关心、爱护、安慰、理解，这对焦虑的孩子是极大的安慰。
克服社交害羞的要点
Don’t Assume
别去假想
Don’t assume that people are judging you. Most people are primarily concerned about themselves and how they come across; they don’t have time to be consumed by your behavior. Remember this, if you don’t remember anything else in this article: Everyone is awkward at times!
别去假想其他人怎么看你。多数人通常只会考虑自身和自己的遭遇，没人有时间来关心你如何如何。要是这篇文章没能给你留下什么印象，那么请记住这句话：有时每个人都很难相处!
When having conversations, every single person at one time or another does or says something that’s a little awkward. Don’t feel that awkward situations or strange silences are your fault alone. Don’t take credit for all the negatives in a conversation. Awkward things will happen, there will be silences, that’s okay; it’s perfectly normal, don’t think it’s not and keep on being yourself – your best self.
交谈时，每个人间或都会说出难堪的话来。不要一厢情愿地以为是你造成了这种尴尬的处境或别扭的沉默。不要把谈话的失败全都怪罪到自己身上。尴尬时常发生，沉默也总是出现，没什么大不了的;这很正常，不要少见多怪——做好你自己就行啦。
5. Don’t Panic – Pause
不要慌张——稍作停顿
There’s no need to panic in social situations. If someone asks you a question, just pause. Think about the question and then answer it appropriately. Most socially anxious or shy individuals react to questions. They feel the need to answer a question immediately, as soon as the final word leaves the mouth of the other person; they feel obligated to start speaking – not necessary.
社交场合无需慌张。要是有人向你发问，那就先停顿一下，想清楚后再恰当回答对方。大部分社交焦虑或害羞的人总是立刻回答问题。他们觉得只要对方话刚说完，就该作出回答;他们认为谈话是一种“义务”——其实完全没必要这样。
You never want to react to a question; you always want to respond, after you pause.
你不需要立即回应提问，你只需在停顿之后回答提问。
When you do this, you will sound more thoughtful, more insightful, and you will have given more deliberate thought to what you’re about to say. You will appear to have "executive presence".
当你这样做时，你听上去会更有想法和见解，你的想法会显得更成熟、更具执行力。
The need to respond right away shows that a person isn’t comfortable with silence. It’s usually the least "powerful" person in a conversation who doesn’t want there to be silence, but silence is okay. It shows that you are comfortable in your skin.
立即回应则显得一个人不习惯沉默。通常，谈话中最没有气场的人也最不习惯沉默，其实沉默也没什么。它说明你能够做到悠然自若。
So learn to pause, never panic! Gather your thoughts, avoid saying “um” and answer like the intelligent person that you are.
所以，学会停顿，不要慌张!整理好思绪，改掉“嗯啊”，像机智的人那样去回答问题吧。
6. Body Language
肢体语言
Your physiology will determine your psychology.
你的生理能决定你的心理。
Avoid having the body language of someone who is shy and/or timid. Don’t haunch over and try not to be seen.
不要染上害羞或胆怯的人的肢体语言。不要缩手缩脚躲起来。
Stand tall, shoulders back. People will believe the body language you portray more than the words you say! If you look timid, people will believe you are timid and will treat you like a timid person.
请挺直腰板。你的肢体语言远比口头言谈更有信服力!如果你看上去就很羞怯，人们也会这么认为，接着就会把你当作羞怯的人对待。
To be seen as a leader, walk like a president. Take up space — like you’re a king. Put your feet on the desk, make large hand gestures, stand tall. If you possess the body language of a leader, people will begin to treat you like a leader. They will assume that if you handle yourself like a king, if you dress like a king, you must have good reason for doing so. People will believe the image you portray!
请像领导一样出场，如总统一般大步流星。像国王那样压住气场——把脚搁在桌上、采用大气的手势、抬头挺胸。如果你拥有领导的肢体语言，人们就会像对待领导那样对你。他们会觉得，要是你穿得像个国王、举止也像国王，那你肯定有两下子。你所树立的形象可以赢得人们的信任!
【克服职场社交中的羞涩】相关文章：
怎样克服羞涩的心理04-18
如何克服职场社交恐惧症04-30
职场新人怎么克服社交恐惧症04-09
职场新人应怎样克服“社交恐惧症”04-29
怎样克服社交的恐惧04-28
职场中如何克服情绪低落04-18
如何克服社交恐惧推荐04-28
职场社交规则04-19
职场的社交技巧04-19
职场社交法则03-30